The Rise of the Clones
by ladyladylove here
Summary: Sarah knew one thing as he told her to RUN, that she wouldn't be able to run away without him. Starting in 1x07 following loosely Orphan Black but will eventually go AU.
1. Chapter 1

The blackness of the night never scared Sarah before, but now on this cloudy, silent, black night Sarah realized she was terrified. She wasn't scared for herself, worried maybe but not scared. She definitely wasn't scared for Fee, he was safe in the car. She wasn't scared for Kira for now because no one really knew who she was so they couldn't know her daughter. No, Sarah was scared for Paul. A revelation in itself because up until today she had no idea if Paul was even going to stick by her. Sarah wasn't sure about her monitor, he was smart, calculating, brutal, hot as fuck, but more recently she had realized he also had a heart. She quickly made a phone call before heading into what would surely be one of the most dangerous things she had ever done.

"Stupid bloody heart," she muttered as she ran into the underground club. She realized Paul's heart was the one reason she had decided she couldn't leave him behind. She realized that in that 1 minute phone call he didn't have to say 'I love you' because 'RUN' said enough. 'RUN' said I am giving up myself, my life, my body, my future so you can go on with yours, so your daughter can go on with hers. So she couldn't leave him there because for the first time in Sarah's life she felt important, cherished even by a man.

As she inched along the basement walls trying to find anything that resembled an office that she assumed Olivier would be in all she could feel was scared. The hallways were plain, cold, damp and lined with cameras. Sarah scoffed and pulled her hood up. "Come on Paul, where are you?" she whispered.

"Hey you, what are you doing down here?"

'FUCK,' Sarah thought. She turned around slowly as to assess any danger that may be aimed her way soon. She turned to see a tall blonde in her late 30's with one white silver eye. She could take this bitch if necessary. Not that she would want that surrounded by these cameras but if necessary she could.

"Yeah, I'm looking for Olivier."

"And who are you?" She sneered.

"I'm…" Sarah faltered. Now would not be a good time to let the whole world know who she was or that she had a family, a child. "I'm Beth, Beth Childes."

The blonde's eyes shifted in recognition. 'Double FUCK' Sarah thought. What if it all ends here? What if this woman was given orders to shoot on site? Sarah's whole body tensed.

"Right this way Ms. Childes." The woman calmly spoke instead.

Sarah was led down a long winding corridor that was so dark at the end she couldn't see her hand in front of her face, until she turned a corner and saw a doorway illuminated by one single dim light bulb. The woman pulled back the door and began speaking to someone Sarah couldn't quite see yet.

"Beth to see you."

"Well this is unexpected."

The door was drawn open and she was shoved inside, and there he sat tied to a chair. "Paul," she whispered. His head slumped. He heard her, his Sarah, though when he had become his Sarah he wasn't sure of yet.

"I told you to run!" he rasped.

"Yeah I don't do run." She countered as Olivier approached her forwardly. Examining her before walking back to his desk. She had to touch him. Everything in her screamed to reach out and let him know it was okay. But it wasn't okay, she was sure of at least that. Though while Olivier had his back turned toward them she reached for him at the very same moment he leaned into her. It wasn't much, her hand went to the back of his head as he rested it on her hip bone. Almost as if they whispered a silent 'I'm here for you if you need it.' Their moment was very short lived however. Interrupted by Olivier ending his phone call and starting with Sarah again.

"I've never actually seen one of you in the flesh before. You're even more exquisite in person," Olivier said as he sauntered back to her.

"He thinks you're the killer." Paul whispered.

"Me? You've got it all wrong." Sarah said hastily trying to explain their way out of this if she could.

He smirked and turned from her. "We have medical evidence that proves your not Beth." He deadpanned and motioned to her file.

"Huh, how can you tell that if we're genetically identical?" Sarah mocked.

"I'm not a scientist." He countered.

"Well you've still got the wrong girl. The one who's killing us is blonde, she's Ukrainian, she's a religious nut." She reasoned evenly.

"You've created a whole new brand of frachrisite." Olivier wondered out loud.

'God he wasn't listening!' Sarah thought 'This is over and I haven't even been able to explain myself.' "You're not listening! It's not me!"

"Exquisite." Olivier mumbled as he advanced on her. Paul immediately tensed in his chair next to Sarah, praying that nothing would happen to her for her responses. Sarah recognized the situation was getting out of control. If she couldn't make him see reason maybe she could barter with him.

"What do you people want?" She pleaded.

"The future." He responded quickly.

This was going nowhere and Sarah's temper was getting the better of her. "A self-directed evolution? You want to grow a tail that's your business," she spat.

"Oh you know about my modest enhancement?" Olivier bragged.

"You've got a tail?" Paul asked disgustedly.

"The fact that I can have a tail, millions of years after we shed it, reminds me of what we can achieve." He whispered to Sarah as he reached out to caress her face. She jerked back unconsciously. This man was disgusting she could tell. She got the creeps just from standing in his office. 'Honestly, the freak with the tail.' She thought as she carefully masked her face of any emotion.

"Would you like to see it?" He asked advancing further upon her person. She saw red from having her space be invaded so easily and quickly smacked his hand away. "God no!" she ground out.

He didn't listen to her and began disrobing slowly. He quickly took off his jacket and neatly laid it across Paul's outstretched legs as he began explaining while fiddling with his belt. "Argentinian bio-hack, blood flow, nerve endings, warm to the touch, but it is merely performance art compared to you. You are our greatest achievement." He said as he unbuttoned his pants.

Sarah was pacing in a small line by the point he finished with his pants and began to ease them off. Paul started panicking. The tension in the atmosphere had risen so quickly he was sure this was the breaking point in which either he or Sarah died. Olivier looked at Sarah and smirked, just as his phone rang on the desk again. "Perhaps later." He whispered as he went to answer the phone. Turning from Sarah and Paul again to begin another phone conversation about having her in custody.

Sarah rushed back to Paul, yanking Olivier's jacket of his legs and throwing it to the floor. He leaned into her again seeking anything he could from her in what was sure to be their last minutes. She caressed his face as she looked into his eyes silently begging for him to let this be. Let them take her. Before she could retract her hand a bag was thrown over her head and then her hands were zip tied behind her back. 'Well I suppose this is my last FUCK,' she thought. As someone began leading her down what she assumed as a hallway. 'Please let Paul be okay. Please let him make it through this,' she chanted in her head. Before coming to a stop and being seated on what she though was high enough to be a table.

'Come on rescue psycho!' She thought as she waited a few more minutes. Then all at once she heard an incredible bang and then a loud thud as if someone right next to her had dropped to the ground. A hand reached out to her face, and she jerked back trying to avoid any danger she could.

"Shhh Shhh Shhh. Hello friend." Helena hissed.

"Oh god about time." Sarah rasped and struggled against her bonds. She didn't know if this was a bad idea. Who was to say that Helena wouldn't just kill her there as well for being one of the clones? She prayed that that wasn't the case and Helena really did want Olivier more.

"Do you want to be saved?" She hissed out violently again.

"Yes Helena untie me." Sarah begged as she continued to struggle.

"I want a name first." Helena mocked as she put her hands to Sarah's throat, lightly applying pressure to let Sarah know she was serious.

"I gave you a name, I gave you Olivier," Sarah shouted as she continued to struggle. She refused to die here alone without Paul by the hands of one of her clones!

"I want the name of a sheep." Helena whispered as she applied more pressure. Sarah's air supply was quickly diminishing. She would be helpless and unconscious very soon.

"Okay… Okay I will give you a name." She rasped out quickly. "Sarah. Sarah Manning." Helena immediately took her hands off Sarah.

"Fine you get to live and I get to play with the shepherd." Helena hissed quickly cutting Sarah's bonds and removing the bag from her head. Sarah was momentarily blinded by the fluorescently lit room, but when she regained her sight Helena was stripping off her jacket, and Sarah realized she was to do the same. Helena grabbed Sarah's and tossed hers to the ground. Sarah watched perplexed for all of about half a second as Helena threw her jacket on and zipped it up, and then slowly perched upon the table as she began stuffing her curly blonde hair into the same bag that was over Sarah's head, before she slipped it over her face. Sarah grabbed Helena's jacket off the ground, turned, and started sprinting.

"Please be alive. Please be alive. Please be alive." Sarah whispered as she ran back in the direction she had come from. As she ran she heard the door swing open and footsteps advance in her direction. 'Shit someone had seen her!' She turned into another hallway and pressed herself as far against the wall as she could as the person ran past. It was Olivier running towards the room she had just left Helena in. 'Maybe he hadn't seen her disappear?' When she could no longer hear his footsteps she started running again. Finally reaching the door she skidded to a stop almost flinging herself into the door itself. 'What if he's dead? What if there is blood everywhere? If he is I can't leave him here.' A million things ran through Sarah's head as she tentatively slide the door away hoping no one was left in the office except Paul.

When she opened it fully there he was sitting in the same chair. No blood, no bruises, no bullets. "PAUL!" She shouted and ran to his side. He turned his head as far as he could to see her as soon as possible.

"Sarah we have to go. Olivier just got in with Helena she is either going to kill him quickly or he is going to subdue her. We have to go!" he yelled.

"I know. I know." Sarah yelled back as she spotted the knife on Olivier's desk. She quickly lunged for it and cut Paul loose as quickly as she could. He grabbed her hand and started running. He had been here many times, he knew exactly where he was in these underground tunnels and he knew exactly how to get out. Sarah had no idea where they were. She just held his hand and ran behind him. Before she knew it the cool night air, that had been so still earlier, hit her face like a blessing. Paul spotted his car and knew Sarah must have brought it with her. He realized from 100 yards that her brother Felix was already sitting in the driver's seat and the car was already running. She ran straight into the car, making Felix jump at the sudden intrusion.

"Fee unlock the door hurry!" Sarah screamed. Felix hit the button and shifted into drive at the same time as Paul ripped open the back door of the car grabbed Sarah and literally flung his body inside with her on top of him. She squeaked and jerked upright and slammed the car door closed as Felix tore out of the parking lot.

"The apartment Fee, we can't go back home they will be looking for us." Sarah begged her brother as she looked at Paul for approval. He nodded and grabbed her hand as if at any second she would slip through his fingers.

"Sarah, I mean honestly a little notice would have been nice," Felix tried to joke as he nervously sped through traffic. Only stopping once they reached the urban flat on the other side of town. They all cautiously got out of the car and Paul immediately went to the trunk and retrieved a screw driver. He began unscrewing all car's plates so it would not be recognizable to anyone who started looking for them.

"Felix where is your car?" Paul asked. Felix pointed to the run down sedan. Paul briskly did the same and unscrewed Felix's plates and returned to the SUV and attached them there instead. Sarah just watched silently as the night began to catch up with her. Tears slowly making their way into her eyes. She couldn't control them. The night had been too hard on her and she sniffled alerting the two men that she was in fact crying. Paul jerked his head up in search of Sarah when he heard the sound. He had finished the plates and threw the screw driver back into the truck before bounding over to her.

Sarah merely reached for him as he connected forcefully with her body. Felix stepped around them and ran up the stairs motioning to Paul to follow to the apartment. Paul picked Sarah up and followed behind Felix. The apartment was just as colorful as always as Felix rolled back the door. It felt safe to Sarah. Paul looked around and decided to sit himself on the couch with Sarah on his lap. Felix sat across from them. It felt over, she felt safe, so she cried. She couldn't help it, it all just sprang forth it was unstoppable. She thought that Paul would let her be, or have Felix comfort her as he thought out a plan. Instead he just cradled her to his chest and ran a hand through her hair as she cried it out.

"Shhh Sarah it's okay. We are safe now. I'm here. I'm fine. You're fine. Felix is fine. Your daughter is fine. You did it. It is over." He whispered over and over. Felix felt the tension and thought the new couple may need some time.

"Well three's a crowd so I'm going to go get drunk by myself at Billy's bar," he said as he slid his jacket back out. Sarah tensed but she realized no one knew where they were, no one had seen Fee, and if Fee left he would be fine because no one was looking for him.

When the door slammed shut Paul couldn't help but feel a little more at ease being with just Sarah. He felt a little guilty because he knew Felix was Sarah's closest family but he didn't know Felix yet and wasn't sure if he totally trusted him yet. He seemed like a likable guy.

"Sarah?" Paul whispered. She nodded against his chest to let him know she heard him. "Maybe we should move you to the bed. I think it would be good for you to rest some. You seem like you may be experiencing a little post-traumatic stress." She nodded again.

He picked her up and moved her to the bed. He pulled back the covers and tucked her in. As he turned to leave the bed and see if there was any coffee in the apartment he could make, she lunged for his arm, grabbing ahold of his sleeve. He looked down at her fingers gripping his wrist so tight her knuckles were beginning to turn white. He followed her hand to her arms, up her shoulders to her face, which was still covered in tear tracks, until he got to her eyes. What he saw there made his heart skip a beat. Her eyes were pleading, haunting, he saw so many emotions floating between them. Moments passed, before she whispered, "Stay. Please."


	2. Chapter 2

_**I suppose I forgot to disclaimer last chapter and should do so now: I do not own any of Orphan Black and thank them so very much for letting me use their super sexy characters! **_

_**On a brighter note: THANKS SO MUCH for all the reads! I had like over a 100 in an hour or so after posting the first chapter. I think it is because there isn't a huge fandom out there regarding the show and there really should be! So get to writing Orphan Black fans. **_

PPOV

"Stay. Please." She whispered it and I honestly think if I wasn't looking at her face when she said it I wouldn't have heard her. Sarah was very different than Beth. Sarah was open, independent but vulnerable, forward. She was unpredictable and sometimes I wanted to scream at her and then sometimes, times like this one I just wanted to hold her. I never just wanted to hold Beth.

The truth, I never really thought of myself as much more than a total tool when regarding Beth. I was hired to be her monitor. I was hired to manipulate her, take advantage of her trust, and monitor her and let others do so as well. I knew she was a job, and so I never let myself open up to her, I never let myself be completely available. Yes I had many regrets regarding Beth, but Sarah wasn't Beth. I could be better this time. I understood now, I could protect Sarah the way I couldn't protect Beth. I was ready now.

"Please." She repeated while clutching my wrist. I looked into her eyes and I saw everything I needed to I saw a future. I leaned in and barely grazed my lips against hers, pressed my forehead to hers, closed my eyes and whispered, "Are you sure you want me to?"

"Yes I'm sure. Stay with my Paul. Felix won't be back for hours if at all. Stay with me here, tonight, tomorrow." She blurted quickly and then looked even more overwhelmed as if waiting for me to say no. Like I could ever tell her no.

"Sarah I'm not going anywhere." I said against her lips. I tried to show her everything I felt in that moment, scared, wanted, comforted, needed, ready. I tried to show her I would stay as long as I could, or as long as she would let me. She searched my eyes for a few seconds before her hands ran up my arms and linked behind my head. She gently pulled me down to her so I kneeled on the bed. My hands roamed her face, behind her ears, through her hair. I felt like I could never touch her enough.

"I had to tell her my name Paul. Helena I had to tell her my name. She kind of has a thing for me." She whispered desperately. I knew what she was thinking, she was thinking of her daughter. She was thinking how we were going to keep her daughter safe without getting killed in the process. She was thinking why Helena even let her go in the first place.

"Shhh it's okay we will figure everything out. I promise we will figure it out. Just not right this second Sarah. Your daughter is safe, no one can even get ahold of you information right now. It will take time." I tried to reason with her with my hands and my words. I tried to be gentle, attentive, I tried to be truthful. She smiled at me even though it was tinged with sadness.

"Paul?" she asked as she wiped the last of her tears away, "Kiss me?"

I did of course. I brushed my lips back against hers as my hands worked back into the ends of her hair. She pulled me in closer and deepened our kiss running her tongue against the seam of my lips. I opened to her, she liked to pretend she was in charge of our sexual encounters, but we both knew I never let her continue that for very long. She bit down on my lower lip as she pulled away from me. I opened my eyes to her smirking like an evil little vixen and I very slowly raised my eyebrow daring her to try and continue that kind of teasing.

"Do you think it is a good idea to play those little games with me tonight Sarah? I think I have been dominated a little too long tonight thank you, especially after being tied to a chair." I half joked half admitted as a lifted her to her knees on the bed. I grabbed her hair a little harder and turned her head so her ear was at my lips.

"I'm in charge of this Sarah, just like I'm in charge of keeping you safe, I'm in charge of this body," I whispered as I licked the shell of her ear and ran a hand down her side. "I'm in charge of this bed," I bit down on her ear this time. "And I'm definitely in charge what this…" I moved her hand over my erection, "does to this body in this bed," I finished as I ground into her hand. Her breathing picked up as she tightened her grip on me as I ground into her.

"Do you understand Sarah?" She nodded quickly once. "Good…" I rasped, "Turn around. Hands on the headboard," I ordered. She looked into my eyes deciding if she was going to give in I think before slowly turning around and resting her hands on the top of Felix's headboard.

I placed my hands at the curve in her waist, and ran my hands up to the sides of her breasts over her sweater. She shivered. I moved her hair to one side and leaned down connecting my mouth to her beautifully graceful neck. As I ran my tongue along the curve of her shoulder I removed her leather jacket. I grazed my teeth at the juncture between her neck and shoulder as my hands worked under the hem of her sweater. She whimpered as I sunk my teeth in a little harder.

"Do you want me to touch you Sarah?" I asked as I ran my hands higher under her sweater towards the bottom of her bra. I knew she was sensitive right under her breasts. She nodded he head back against my shoulder as she leaned into me.

"That isn't an answer Sarah," I said as I forcefully grabbed her hip and pushed her into the headboard. "Do you want me to touch you Sarah?" I repeated.

"Yes Paul, touch me please!" She whimpered again. The energy was palpable. I could feel her body warming under my hands as I pulled her sweater over her head, leaving her in only her bra and jeans. She was fucking perfect. Her waist was slim and her spine was slightly visible, her back had two small dimples right before her hips flared. I dipped my head down and ran my teeth against the top of her spine which raised goose bumps on her skin. I ran my hands around to her stomach and caressed my way up to her covered breasts.

"You're perfect Sarah." I said as I ground myself against her ass, unhooking the front clasp of her bra and letting her breasts fall into my hands. She moaned loudly as I tweaked her nipples roughly and bit into her shoulder at the same time. She started grinding her ass against me, and I knew she was wet.

"Are you wet for me baby?" I whispered as I unbuttoned her jeans and slid my hands under her panties. I slipped a finger between her lips and felt her soaking through the fabric between her thighs.

"FUCK," she moaned out. "Paul why such a tease tonight?"

"I'm not teasing Sarah. Just taking care of what is mine. I like to take care of my things." I responded as I worked the jeans over the curve of her ass with one hand as my fingers continued to explore around her lips and opening leaving her clit unattended.

"You're teasing." She gritted out as she desperately tried to grind down on my fingers to get more friction where she wanted it.

"Lift you knee Sarah." I commanded as I slipped one of her legs out of the jeans and then the other. Leaving her now only in her black lace half boy shorts. I pressed my body against hers and wrapped my hand back around her breasts, pinching and rolling the nipple as I finally pressed down on her clit. He head shot back and rested on my shoulder as she gasped.

"You know Sarah I think I would like to have you cum for me before I even unbutton any of my shirt. I know you can do that for me can't you?" I ground myself back against her ass as I sunk two fingers straight into her drenched sheath, twisting until I found her gspot.

"Oh fuck yes, right there Paul." She moaned as I pressed my palm to her clit and ground against it as I moved my fingers against her spot.

"That's it baby ride my hand," I said as she started meeting my hand as it thrust into her. "MMM you make me so fucking hard Sarah. Do you feel that baby? Do you feel what you do to me?" I asked as I rubbed myself against her ass as she bounced against me harder.

"Yes! BLOODY FUCK. Don't stop, don't stop." She chanted as she started tightening against my fingers.

"That's it Sarah, cum for me baby. Cum all over my fingers so I can fuck that perfect little tight pussy." I whispered right at her ear before I bit down on the lobe.

"Oh God Yes, fuck, Fuck, FUCK!" She cried as she tensed rigid while her pussy clamped down convulsing and gushing around my fingers. She turned on me the second I pulled my fingers from her, lust almost violently crossing her eyes. She grabbed my shirt by the collar and ripped open buttons flying everywhere as her hands found their way to my belt.

"Sarah." I warned as she pulled the belt from its loops forcefully. "I don't think that was the best idea. Now I'm going to have to make sure your hands can't damage anything else." I said as I gripped both her wrist in one hand and took the belt she had just removed. I pushed her down on the bed and placed her hands above her head and wrapped the belt around her wrists before wrapping it through the headboard and buckling it back around her hands. She was totally open to me now. Laying vulnerable in only black lace panties tied to a bed eyes wild with lust.

"FUCK Paul! Quit this shit and fuck me already." She spat clearly no longer in the mood for being played with.

I moved off the bed without a word. Unbuttoning and unzipping my slacks and letting them pool around my feet. I quickly stripped away the boxer briefs as well before climbing back on the bed between Sarah's thighs. She lifted a foot and ran it along my side cupping my hip with the arch of her foot.

"Are you going to just stare Paul or are you going to do something with that?" she smirked as she eyed my dick.

"You know exactly what I'm going to do with this Sarah." I said as I stroked in front of her a few times. She bit down on her lip hard and I knew it was to keep herself from moaning at the sight of my touching myself. She was a naughty little thing and she liked a show.

"I think you're just getting impatient baby. If I didn't know any better I would think you hadn't been fucked in a long time the way you are soaking through those panties for me. You want it bad don't you Sarah? You want me to fuck that little pussy?" I asked as I hooked my fingers into her panties and pulled them over her hips and threw them off the bed.

"If I didn't know any better I would think you were still being a giant bloody tease. Oh wait YOU ARE!" She countered. I pulled her thighs apart forcefully and lifted her hips towards me the belt helping hold her weight off the bed as I sunk into her in one violent thrust.

"FUCK YES." She screamed as I started brutally pounding into her.

"Is that what you wanted Sarah? Is that what you needed baby?" I whispered into her ear as I continued to thrust into her channel. "GOD you're so tight Sarah, so hot. Fuck you feel so good." I rasped out.

She didn't say anything she just looked into my eyes, almost looking through my soul again. There were no words, just the sound of skin slapping against each other. I wanted this to last forever. She never took her eyes off me. I angled her differently and thrust deeper knowing she would cum for me hard if I hit her right. She moaned as I slid past her gspot, rubbing against it every time I pushed in and out of her. My body was on fire, every nerve ending was working overtime. She felt so good, she was so hot, so tight, so wet, and she was mine now, and she was going to stay that way.

"Paul. PAUL! I'm going to cum. I'm going to cum. Don't stop fuck me just like that." She grated as she met my thrusts trying to push herself closer to her breaking point. I felt her start to flutter around me and I couldn't hold off any longer. I reached down and rubbed her clit in fast tight circles as I let me orgasm start washing over me, thrusting more erratically.

"yes, Yes, YES! OH FUCK PAUL!" She screamed out as she clamped down around me again sucking me as far into her as possible. I couldn't take it anymore and I moaned out her name as I started spurting inside her. I shot into her four times before I finally stopped feeling like the sky had sucked me into it. I collapsed on top of her keeping most of my weight on my forearms as I buried my head in her neck and hair. I reached up and unfastened the belt letting her pull her hands out the rest of the way. Her hands found their way to the back of my head and held me to her.

"Shh Shhh Shhh it's alright." She whispered before I ever realized I was crying onto her shoulder.

"I'm here Paul, I'm safe, you're safe, Felix is safe, my daughter is safe. We're safe." She repeated my earlier words back to me. I was strong. I was her protector. I was brutal, and deadly, and trained to kill, but in that moment I felt so lost at the thought of her not being there. "I'm here." She repeated.

"Sarah?" I asked. She nodded against me. "Promise me next time you'll run okay. Next time you'll run, you'll get your daughter, and you'll keep running. Promise me."

She pushed at my chest so she could see my face. Searching for answers to my questions in my own face. I pulled out of her and rolled to my side rolling her into my chest. She kissed my chest where my heart beat under the skin.

"Paul, I can't promise you that. Kira is protected, Kira is safe she has a support system. You don't and if I can help you I can't run. You have to understand that." She whispered against my skin. 'Kira was her daughter's name. She was a beautiful little girl that looked much like her mother.' I pulled her into me tighter. I didn't know what we were. I didn't know how it had happened so fast but I knew I loved her. I knew she was important to me, the most important thing to me. I knew if given the chance I would never run either. I would never run unless she was running with me. But I wasn't ready to tell her that. Instead I just said, "Tell me about Kira." So she did. Until we both drifted to sleep with nothing more than a sheet in an unfamiliar apartment, in someone else's bed.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Of course as the avid Orphan Black fan I am I feel the need to just point out how terribly emotional the last episode was. Unfortunately there wasn't a ton of Paul/Sarah so we are probably going to go a little AU now because there were so many things I could see happening, or want to happen that hasn't or didn't. **

***On another note I am hoping I will be making quite a bit of updates in the next week because I will be home from work all week because I'm having surgery so hopefully everything works out that way. **

**Disclaimer: Of course I didn't create Orphan Black and don't own any of the characters or plot. **

Songs that inspired this chapter were_ Call Me In The Afternoon, Sahara Mahala, My Love and Mace Spray. _

SPOV

"We can't go back to the townhouse." He whispered to me as the morning light streamed into the room.

I turned and linked my arm behind his head and pulled him to me. He had become such a diligent protector so quickly.

"Shhhh." I whispered to him as I cradled his head to mine.

"We can't they are going to be looking for us." He insisted

"You know…" I said as I rose and sat on the edge of the bed with my back towards him, "I had almost forgotten I was a clone."

I so wanted to forget I was a clone. Why couldn't things be so much simpler? I could take Kira and get a little flat in the city. I could use Beth's identity to get a nice job. Paul could move in eventually. We could go to family dinners out at small cafes. We could get a dog. But it was never going to be like that. It was never ever going to be like that. There were only two ways this ended now. With both of us dead and Kira safe with Mrs. S, or us killing everyone so that we could be normal. Two endings, but only one path.

He sat up to and I turned and looked at him over my shoulder. He was concerned and he began to rub circles on my back.

"Hey, hey, I know but this is seriously Sarah I have to think about you now. I have to think about that little girl, the one who ties flowers in her hair and builds sand castles, the one with the little knit hat she only wears when it is really cold, the one you described to me so in detail last night. I have to think about both of you now."

My shoulders sagged. I knew I was being unrealistic. We were all in danger but maybe I needed just one night to forget that someone was trying to kills me, kill us. I looked at him then and knew what he was really saying. I wasn't sure if I was ready for it yet. But the implication was there. He wanted what I wished for and he knew there was only one path to get there just like I did.

"We need a plan Sarah." He whispered as he leaned over and kissed my shoulder.

"Yeah I know."

Just as I was about to get up the door rolled back and Felix strutted in. Bee lining right for us. I hiked the sheet up over my tits. He looked pissed and I couldn't blame him considering I had just done some seriously serious things in his bed. 'Deliciously serious things!' I thought to myself before the temper tantrum started.

"Oh wonderful, Bonnie and Clyde. Why don't we just ask Alison to move in with us too!" He snarked.

"Sarah can't go back to the townhouse Felix. She needs to stay with you for a while."

"Oh really and will you be joing us too? Let's just infringe on my artistic space yeah?"

Felix was clearly a little bit annoyed. I couldn't blame him. I had been putting so much on him since I had come back and quite honestly I realized now how selfish I had been with my brother. I had told Paul all about it last night and we had talked about me making things right. I needed to. I guess I hadn't really ever told Felix I was sorry and I really should have started a long time ago. He turned back to the kitchen and started making toast as Paul and I began dressing.

"Fee we need a plan. Art keeps bloody calling and we need to figure out what we are going to do about Helena, Leaky, Olivier." I said as I slipped my shirt over my head and threw on a pair of underwear.

"I am going to deal with Olivier. He messed with what is mine, and I will handle him." Paul gritted out as he stood and pulled his jeans over his muscled thighs before buttoning them at the v in his abs. Last night came flashing back to me all over again but I was quickly broken out of my thoughts by Felix again.

"And just how do you think you are going to accomplish that?" Felix remarked. "Are you going to magically make him change his mind that Sarah isn't in charge of killing the clones? That she isn't just sending Helena all over the place to murder people?"

"Paul seriously you can't go to him. He could kill you!" I immediately started panicking. What was it with him and just walking right up to Olivier!

"It is fine Sarah. I was a solider before any of this remember. I have already hacked into and altered the security footage at Neolution. It only looks like Helena was there. I also know for a fact Olivier is upside down in a hospital right now recovering from the loss of his beloved tail." Paul disgustingly finished.

"So what you go to him and convince him Helena is who they are looking for?" I asked.

"Something like convince, sure," Paul whispered.

"So what you're going to like kill him?" Felix asked.

"Only if absolutely necessary." Paul answered.

This all worried me. Every last part of it. I hated that he so frequently just threw himself into danger but what the hell was I supposed to say? He was clearly very trained in this area. He had saved me before and I was sure he could probably take care of himself especially now that he realized we were on the opposite side of the fence now. Everyone that mattered now knew we were working together.

"Okay." I said.

"Okay? Okay? That is most definitely not okay Sarah!" Felix ranted. "What part of any of this is okay?"

"Look Fee, he knows what he is doing. If he thinks this is best, I trust him." I said as I looked into Paul's eyes. He nodded as Felix sighed heavily. Paul was clearly done with this conversation and eager to get started with whatever tortuous plans he had for the day. I stole another glance at him from across the flat. God he was beautiful. He had dressed like he always seemed to in dark colors. We seemed to have this in common. Dark jeans, a grey t shirt, leather jacket, and black boots. Our uniform seemed to blend into each other the longer we coexisted. As I continued roaming up his well-toned body I realized he was looking at me staring at him. I blushed and looked down at the floor.

"If you leave the apartment today Sarah I expect to know about it." He said as the silence of the room was ended. My eyes shot back to his face ready to fight like holy hell about not still having a monitor. But when I looked back at him, all the fight left me. I realized if this was ever going to work we, all three, if not Alison and Cosima, were all going to have to start more cohesively working together. I just shrugged at him instead. He nodded again and walked over to me. He kissed me on the head once before making eyes at Felix as if to say 'If I don't hear from her and you do something I kill you first,' and walked out the door.

This was such a blood fucking mess! I huffed and flopped onto a chair by the couch that Felix was laying on. The silence was heavy in the air for a few minutes. There were so many things running through me head, last night, Kira, Felix and how terribly I had been treating him, how long before the police started piecing things together, Alison, how fucking stupid Cosima was being.

"So how was the shagging?" Felix mused before he started chuckling.

I started laughing I couldn't help it. You had to hand it to my brother really. We spend the last 24 hours almost getting killed multiple times and me just dragging him into it without really asking and all he can think is to ask how the bloody sex was. Always one to lighten the mood I suppose.

"It was…I don't know Fee. He said he loved me, I think it was like some kind of weird love break through. He asked a lot about Kira."

"What?" Felix gasped. "Super dominating, killer Paul asked about tea and tirars Kira?"

"Yeah I don't know Fee, I think this time is a lot different you know. This isn't like all those other times, I would use a guy to use and disappear. This I don't know it feels real. It feels safe, even though I don't feel safe 95% of the time. He makes me feel like I could be safe."

"Well he sure made sure you felt that way last night. Honestly Sarah it was like watching the bloody notebook or something ridiculous. All the cuddling and the playing with the hair, rubbing the back, it was weird, I had to jet."

I laughed and stuck my foot into his face just to gross him out.

"Oh shut up you love it and all the drama." I giggled.

He pushed my feet out of his face making a disgusted face. My phone went off again. Art probably calling for the millionth time. I'm sure he had probably made some kind of connection and me continuing to ignore things was probably making everything worse but I wasn't ready to deal with him yet. I wasn't even sure if I was out of immediate danger yet. Fee and I bullshitted about for the next few hours before Mrs. S stopped by for a nice visit as well. 'Nice visit really Sarah like when you have to lie right to someone's face and they let you know the police think you're dead. Which by the way you already knew! A right nice tea visit it was.'

Strangely she accepted that I wasn't ready to tell her everything. But I think she knew as well as I did that I would blow up everything around me, burn my whole life here down, if I had to do it to protect Kira. She saw it in my eyes, and for a second I realized she must have felt like this once. When she did the same thing for me. She knew what to look for all over my face because she had already done it herself.

That's when the day decided to get even more fucked up. Felix's phone rang and within seconds he was flustered and throwing my things in a bag.

"No I need to know exactly what you told them? How long ago did they come? Did you give them all my information? My address? Everything? Okay yeah, yeah okay alright. Next week? We are still on yeah?" He finished the call pulling me up by the arm at the same time.

"FUCK." He shouted. "The police were just at the morgue the saw your body. They know it looks like Beth. They got my information they said they wanted to ask me some questions and they are probably one their way here now Sarah." He finished quickly shoving my bag at me.

"It's okay Fee, I will just go. You just have to act devastated. You lost your sister. It is fine."

He huffed annoyed taking down all his clone paintings and hiding them behind each other in the back corner of the flat.

"Sarah you have to go! Bloody now! What part of they are probably on their way do you not get?" He yelled again right as there was a knock at the door.

"Fuck!" I whispered.

"Go! Go down the fire escape. Yeah?" He motioned toward the window by the bed.

"Felix please be home!" A voice we both knew well slurred behind the door. 'Oh thank fucking god it was only Alison!' 'What this is even worse how are you going to explain two dead people that look exactly like not one but two living people?' 'Fuck right this is worse.' UHHHH! I wished I could just turn my bloody mind off sometimes.

I wrenched the door open and grabbed a hold of Alison.

"Felix! I did bad things!" She pouted.

"I would love to hear all about them just not right now." Fee called as I dragged her down the hall.

I didn't know how he was going to do with Art. Hopefully he was convincing enough to make Art think he was in no way involved. The last thing we needed was Art thinking Fee and Beth were connected somehow. Alison reeked of pot, and was stumbling all over the place meaning she was obviously drunk too. Just my fucking luck. I pulled out my phone and called Paul and got his voicemail like I expected. I let him know Alison had showed up and the cops were on their way to Felix's so he shouldn't go back there before throwing Alison into the passenger side of her van. 'God why do soccer moms all drive bloody mini vans?'

"I had sex with Ainsley's husband Sarah! All this is such a mess. I don't want to divorce Donnie. But I have to Sarah I can't lie to him anymore. I can't lie to my kids it isn't fair. I just blew up their whole lives because I fucked him, I just hate it all Sarah." Alison dragged on.

In truth, she was right. I felt like lying had become my entire life until recently regarding the c word. I understood how she felt. She felt trapped, like her life was slowly dying away because she had to start hiding everything. She did really. That was what our lives had become.

"Alison do you ever wonder what it would be like if we didn't have to hide?" I wondered out loud.

"What like if we told them?" She mused.

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. If Helena knew about me then it wasn't a terrible assumption the think she would soon know about Kira. So I needed to let Mrs. S in on what was going on much sooner than right after I had handled everything. She needed to know now because she needed to keep Kira safe while I couldn't. Clones though was a hard pill to swallow. So maybe I should show her instead of tell her.

"Alison. We are going to run an errand okay." I said as I started driving over to my childhood home. It seemed to be a lot shorter than I ever remembered before then. Alison only took minimal convincing in her inebriated state. We both walked up to the house and I let us in with my key to find Mrs. S napping on the couch. She jostled when she heard the door close and asked who it was.

"Shh it is just me. I think I am ready to tell you what is going on." I said just as Alison stepped around the corner to a very shocked looking Mrs. S. She invited us to have a sit and before I knew it I was spilling everything and couldn't stop. If fact the longer I went on the more frantic I got, particularly when describing my run-ins with Helena. Alison was mostly quiet until Mrs. S started asking her questions about her life. At which time she went totally mental again about how she blew everything up and was quickly put to bed in her drunken state. While Mrs. S was upstairs with Alison my phone went off again but I had resolved to ignoring it in case it was the police station again. As I was thinking I saw the book of photos and clippings of me and Felix Mrs. S had made on the counter and started flipping through it.

"Do you think this has something to do with how you came to me?" Mrs. S asked as she returned to the kitchen.

"I don't know. Cosima and Alison both said that their mums really wanted kids enough to use IVF. I guess I'm just wondering what happened to my mum you know?"

"You know there were rumors….I mean well most everything we ever heard was rumors, but there were rumors that the kids that came in Carlton's pipeline, children in the black were well they were being medically experimented on."

"Carlton's pipeline. What kind of experiments?" Maybe if I could find Carlton I could find more answers to all these questions.

"I don't know love. Everything was rumors then." She explained. I could tell it was a time in her life she didn't want to so easily go back to, even if our lives here hadn't been a cake walk.

"Carlton brought me to you would he know who my mother was?" I wondered. Maybe it was worth a shot. Maybe I could find out if I even had a mother to begin with at all.

"He may but even if he did he might not tell me." She whispered.

"Could you try?" I asked

"Last I heard he was in prison, but I'll try." She resolved. I could tell it was difficult for her to agree to but deep down I knew because she loved me and wanted to keep me and Kira safe she would try anything. A chill ran down my spine at the thought of what I would do if I had to do some of the things she had done to keep Kira safe like she had kept me safe. It chilled me to the bone to even think about. But then I realized I had not only been a little frightened but it had also gotten considerably colder. I looked to my left and saw the door was wide open.

I leapt up from the table and sprinted to the door. Something was wrong I could tell. Mrs. S followed shortly behind me.

"Kira?" I called before turning back towards the stairs intending to go up and check on her in her bed. But then the most heart clenching sight blinded me. There on the coat hook wasn't Helena's jacket I had brought with me, but my favorite leather stood in its place. Helena was here and at that second in my heart I knew she had Kira.

"OH MY GOD! It's Helena." I screamed before running out into the street. I looked both ways and realized Helena was running towards the end of the street with my daughter.


End file.
